Navigating the world with a bump that’s not my own

Life is good right now. The holidays are coming, fall weather is actually happening in Texas. Big things are happening at work and my children are just as wonderful as ever! June bug is a normal part of my every day. I think about her mommy and daddy every single day, every time she kicks me. I don’t ignore her, I rub my belly lovingly and tell her how loved and wanted she is. I tell her that her birthday will be the best day in so many peoples lives. I tell her that I love to take care of her, but I can’t wait for her to go home. My kids talk about her sometimes, sometimes the feel her kick and talk to her. Mostly they ask her if she’s doing good and not to kick their mommy too hard. Curtis interacts with her when I get super excited about major movements, and as she grows he’ll play with her (with lights on my belly or making funny noises on my belly or even playing music for her).

We are all very content with our life and our little visitor.

But now that my belly is expanding more and more people are starting to notice that I am without a doubt “with child”. I know that my pregnancy is not the “norm” so I have no harsh feelings toward people.. but I am more aware of people being intrusive on pregnant women in general. “When are you due” “How many kids do you have” “Did you mean to get pregnant” “Is it a girl or a boy?” “You’re tiny!” “You’re huge!” Just to name a very few things I have already heard.

When my kids are with me, they are the first ones to say “June isn’t my sister, my mom is just holding her for “mama B” which is the truth, but just leads to a whole new slew of questions. “Are you gay?” “Are you her sister?” “Why would you do that?” “What about your poor confused children?” “How does your husband feel about all this?!”

So I guess I really just want to take a minute to put this out in the universe somewhere. This belly is mine, what’s growing inside is not:

22weeks
22 weeks

My husband and my children adore J&B and little June. We were all WELL aware that we were not going to have another child (AND DON’T WANT ONE). My children think nothing of it other than mom is getting fat. They are not confused, they are not scared, they are happy to help another family. This woman is going to have a beautiful daughter in a few short months:

Mama B & Collin
Mama B & Collin

Doesn’t she look beautiful!? Glowing even?! Because she’s having a baby! She’s going to be a mom! YAY! You know what else? She trusts me. She trusts me with the most precious thing in the whole world. So next time you ask me “Are you aloud to eat that?” or “How could you do such a crazy thing?!” Stop it. Because not a single person who has said anything like that, has been someone who has struggled with infertility, or simply can’t have their own baby. So just leave me be to grow a little human while I raise my own little humans. I’m very happy to say that my family is NOT normal and I like it that way, thank you very much!

June Bug says mind ya own!
June Bug says mind ya own!

1 thought on “Navigating the world with a bump that’s not my own

  1. Randy, friend of Debra’s in Guatemala here. Thank you for this…thank you very much. Well done, well said, and long overdue to BE said…so thank you for holding on to June Bug for a time; thank you for your inestimable gift to Joe and Brooke, thank you for making my friend Debra a grandmother and so very very happy, and thank you for sharing this and speaking out. Good luck to you…you and your family are very extraordinary and special folks. Much love and light to you all.

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